|notreallyme10 (notreallyme10) wrote,|
@ 2007-08-20 10:03:00
Originally posted: 12/10/06
By this point, we knew each other well enough that we could joke about it. And as usual it was a closed set so there were very few others there to get an eyeful. At the moment the crew is all gathered around and the director is discussing some problem with the lighting or a camera angle or some other boring shit. We as per the norm are naked, other than the stupid cock socks and draped all over each other. Before the interruption Gale had been simulating giving me a blow job and I am sorry but any guy as hot as Gale bumping their face against my dick over and over again gets me hard. Not full on hard, but you know the blood starts flowing. Anyway we were still sort of in position, waiting for filming to start up again, with Gale laying by my side sort of half on his stomach with his head by my crotch. And like I said we’re making jokes. He keeps on saying things like, “With all of this work I’m doing, this is all I get? Seems like you could at least get it all the way up.” I giggle and think; little does he know that that probably wouldn’t be too much of a stretch. Or maybe he does know, because a second later he reaches out and strokes me. Almost simultaneously my breath catches and I look around to make sure no one saw. Seems that no one did, but what the hell was that. OK, I said that last part out loud. “Just wondering what it would take to get you hard for real.” Now my head is reeling….. is he teasing me still or is he teasing me? But then next thing in know, we are back to work and he has his answer. I am definitely hard now and his face is in my crotch and could this be any more embarrassing? I’m thinking about my grandmother and George W Bush and every other gross or completely non-sexual thing I can think of but it just isn’t working. Sure this happens once in awhile on set, which is why we are pretty comfortable. It happens to me more than Gale, which I attribute to the fact that I am younger and actually gay. But it happens to him sometimes too and we generally don’t worry about it. But this…is different. First off, I am almost painfully hard and second Gale actually touched me sexually off camera. What the hell am I supposed to make of that? Gale is a good guy and we have become pretty good friends. But I’m not an idiot, and I don’t fall for straight guys. Do I think about him sometimes when I jerk off? Sure, the guy is fucking hot. But I have never held any sort of delusions that something might happen between us. I like him and respect him as a friend, so that is why this has really caught me off guard. I honestly have no idea what to think.
His dick was right in front of me, half hard and pulsing just a little, and for some reason I just had to touch it. Man just the thought of me making him hard, made me hard too. Thank god I was laying on my stomach and could easily hide my excitement. Poor Randy was laying exposed in front of a small crowd and my head did little to cover his noticeable problem. But at least he had an excuse, I had been rubbing my face on his dick (probably more so than absolutely necessary) for the last thirty minutes. I on the other hand had no good reason for an erection and therefore was immensely glad for the fact that it was hidden from view. After we were finished shooting the scene we waited patiently for our robes which I was thankfully able to slip into discreetly. I was a little worried that Randy might be mad at me, but he seemed friendly if not a little uncomfortable. We chatted about random stuff like filming schedules and weekend plans on our way to our dressing rooms and I couldn’t help but feel like we were avoiding the obvious conversation. We made plans to meet up for a beer in a few hours which was something we often did on days like today when we finished filming at a reasonable hour. I couldn’t help feeling relieved that everything seemed normal between us.
I could tell that Gale was pleased we were getting together tonight and I was glad when he asked me cause I was a little concerned he might feel weird after what had happened. Gale seems to be a pretty sensitive guy in general. I say seems to be because I never really get the feeling that I know him completely. He is friendly, but quiet. I feel like I am an open book but with Gale I always feel like there is some sort of barrier that keeps me from getting past the surface. And the few times I really felt like he opened up it was usually some sort of concern about how he made someone else feel. Gale is very aware of how he affects others. I guess that is one of the things I like about him and part of what makes him a worthwhile friend even though he can be so closed off in other ways. Also there is something about Gale that makes me want to break down his walls. I want to become a friend that he can trust enough to open up to. So I guess I was relieved that what happened today didn’t have him hiding from me. I assumed that we would head out to our favorite local bar, but when I got to Gale’s place he just invited me in. So now I found myself on Gale’s couch, beer in hand, talking like we always do, but still wondering in the back of my mind if everything was going to be OK between us.
“I’m attracted to you.” To Randy’s credit he didn’t noticeably freak out at this somewhat sudden and possibly surprising admission, so I soldiered on. “And after what happened today I felt like I should explain and apologize, it was incredibly unprofessional. I guess maybe I just let myself get a little too comfortable with you and honestly I just couldn’t help myself. But I really am sorry and I hope you’re not pissed.” Randy, whose emotions generally play out very visibly across his face, was amazingly blank and I was starting to get a little scared. He hadn’t seemed mad earlier but I was starting to wonder if I had said the wrong thing. The silence was suddenly dragging out between us, but I had exhausted what I had to say so I forced myself to wait patiently for him to speak…to respond in some way…holy shit he is just staring at me. OK, he may not have freaked out but I’m starting to.
I have to say something. Gale is obviously concerned and I can see his panic building, but I can’t seem to find words. I was not expecting this at all. I thought he was just messing around and took it a little too far. I never seriously thought he would say he was attracted to me and that he just couldn’t help but touch me. What does this mean? OK speak...just make words come out of your mouth...NOW. But I can’t. And now the silence has stretched on too long to be normal…..far too long. So I do the only thing I can think of, I lean in and very gently kiss him on the mouth. My lips are parted, but only ever so slightly and I feel like I’m moving in slow motion. There are no tongues involved and I can’t even begin to count the number of far more passionate kisses that we have shared on set. But this kiss is intimate in a way that no on set kiss has ever been and before it is even over, I’m thinking I want more.
He pulls back and just looks at me like he is trying to read my mind and I can’t really blame him cause I’m trying hard to read his too. If I thought the silence before the kiss was awkward, I was sorely mistaken, because this, this is awkward. Add to that the fact that all I want to do is kiss him again and you basically get the most uncomfortable situation of my life, and that is saying something. I’m one of those people who tends to walk around in a cloud of uneasiness…..um is that a word. I guess I should say that I don’t really put people at ease and I rarely feel at ease around others. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t feel like I am some sort of social pariah and I definitely have friends but I am very well acquainted with feeling awkward. In fact one of the things I like so much about Randy is that he is one of the few people I have met in my life that I almost always feel comfortable around, and look what I did, touched his dick and made it all weird. Only he kissed me, so what does that mean? It didn’t feel like an ‘awe poor Gale you’re so pathetic’ kiss. It felt more like an ‘I like you too Gale’ kiss. Either way, it doesn’t seem like his is mad at me, which is a good sign.
Somehow we ended up back at the silent staring thing. Gale seems completely lost in his thoughts and I simply don’t want to wait to kiss him again. I lean in tentatively, cause there is a big difference between being attracted to a man and actually going through with a physical relationship with one when you are straight (like I know what the hell I’m talking about, I couldn’t be farther from straight if I tried). My point is I’m not sure Gale is ready or even really wants to be with me, but I can’t seem to restrain myself….which seems to be going around today. So I start out slow, just brushing my lips against his and the way he leans into me tells me we are on safe ground for the time being. I ease my tongue out and gently run it along his lower lip. His arm comes around me and pulls my body closer so that our necks are no longer straining. I suck his lower lip (God I love his mouth) into my mouth and he moans softly. His hand comes to the back of my head, his fingers weaving themselves in my hair and he deepens the kiss. His mouth is covering mine now and his tongue finds its way into my mouth. I let him take control of the kiss as his other hand makes its way to my back. He is holding us close together and kissing me with an intensity I’m not sure I have ever felt before. And yet I feel like I have to be careful with Gale in a way I never have with another man.
We kiss for what seems like a long time and I would be lying if I said I didn’t want things to go further, but Randy seems to have drawn some sort of invisible line that requires our clothing to stay put and our hands to remain above the waist. Not for lack of trying on my part and I feel like I am back in high school. I almost laugh out loud when I realize that I get to touch more of him at work, that just today I stroked his nearly naked, and might I add hard, cock. That last part wasn’t exactly work, but still. On the other hand this probably all seems a little sudden to him and it is only fair to give him a chance to catch up. After a little while he gets up and tells me he should head home. I try not to let my disappointment show. “We should talk about this tomorrow.” I’m sure he realizes how that sounds by the look on my face cause he smiles shyly and then takes my hand and puts it on his crotch so I can feel how hard he is. “I don’t want to, but I have to go OK? We’ll talk tomorrow.” We end up making out again by the front door of my apartment and I can tell he wasn’t lying when he said he didn’t want to leave which makes me feel better about our talk tomorrow.
I deserve a medal for walking out that door. I did not want to leave Gale last night, but I forced myself and I know it was the right thing to do. If I had stayed we would have had sex or at least that is what I wanted to do and it was what Gale seemed to want too. But I just had to make sure that we were doing the right thing. This whole thing is just a little too important to jump into and yeah I’m anal like that. I like to make sure I am making the right decision before I dive into things. I mean this could affect not only our friendship but our jobs as well. What we do sort of depends on our being able to stand each other. I’m not sure I could get naked a fuck around with someone I can’t stand. But what would be even worse is if Gale couldn’t stand me. I don’t want him to feel like I pushed him into something, I don’t want him to regret having sex with me and then hate me for it. So now I’m laying in bed wondering what I should do and wondering if I should jerk off for the third time since I left him last night when my phone rings. I’m considering not answering and going with the jerking off idea instead, give me a break Saturday is my lazy day, when I see on the display that it is him. “Wanna have lunch with me?” Is the first thing he says when I answer. I know I sound nervous when I ask where he wants to meet. “Why don’t I bring something over to your place?” I hesitate and I can tell he is half joking and half serious when he says “What, don’t think you can trust me not to jump you?” My voice is completely serious when I respond. “Not sure I can trust myself not to jump you.” “Well in that case I’m on my way.” Um OK, now what?
So it probably seems a little pathetic, but I was just too nervous to wait around all day for him to let me know he was ready to talk. So I decided that instead of torturing myself I would just get this over with first thing, which explains why I am at rolling up to Randy’s place at 11:30 in the morning on a Saturday. He seemed a little unsure of the whole thing on the phone but I can’t imagine talking about all this in some restaurant and there is no way we can go back to work without getting this figured out. Randy answers the door in a pair of pajama pants and a white tee-shirt with his hair still obviously a mess from sleep, but his mouth is minty fresh and I know that because the minute I am through the door I’m all over him. OK so apparently I couldn’t be trusted not to jump him. But he wasn’t lying when he said he couldn’t trust himself because he is all over me too. We are far more frantic than we were last night and both of our shirts are off and my pants are unbuttoned before he pulls away. He takes a few steps back and a deep breath and says “I really think we need to talk before we do this.” I really don’t want to talk but I understand where he is coming from so I take few deep breathes of my own and sit on the couch. He sits on the other end of the couch and I wish he would put his shirt back on because it is hard enough to control myself without having him half naked. “I thought you were straight.”
OK, I’m not even sure where that came from; I thought I was worried about our friendship and work, not his sexuality. On the other hand, it isn’t an unreasonable thing to ask. “I am.” Um sorry Gale but that isn’t gonna cut it. “Then do you want to explain what we were just doing?” I give him a look that is supposed to let him know I find all of this highly suspicious, but he just seems confused. “I like you…Not men in general, you.” I’m not cutting him any slack; I’m still just giving him that same look. “Look I like women, but I also like you and if it doesn’t bother me, then why should it bother you?” That seems like a fair question and I honestly can’t think of a good answer. And all the rest of it, work and our friendship, we could talk all day long and never figure it out. There are no guarantees about those sorts of things so I just have to weigh the risks against the fact that Gale is sitting on my couch with no shirt on. He has to be one of the most beautiful men I have seen in my entire life and I guess that I am pretty shallow, cause that seems to make my decision much easier.
He finally, finally kisses me. I mean I guess it could have been worse, that probably was the shortest relationship conversation I’ve ever had, but I still feel like I have been waiting forever. I maneuver us until we are lying side by side on the couch all the while kissing him. I run my free hand over his chest and down across his belly and I love how he sort of arches into me. I feel his dick bumping into me and it’s weird to think I’m used to that from our on set kisses. It sort of hits me suddenly that I am way out of my league here; I should probably feel really uncomfortable about this whole thing. I mean realistically I have never been with a guy and I don’t actually know what I am doing and yet somehow I’m not really worried. Randy pulls back and looks at me. He holds eye contact as his hand reaches to finish undoing my pants. I can tell that he is carefully gauging my reaction so I make an effort not to look away. His fingers play with the waistband of my boxers for a few seconds before he lays his palm flat on my stomach and then slides inside. Fuck.
Holy shit. His dick is fucking hard and the way his eyes roll back in his head when I grasp him puts any remaining worries right out of my mind. We help each other out of the rest of our clothing and I laugh when I realize neither of us is wearing a cock sock. I share my thoughts with him and he laughs too and I think that puts us both at ease. He nuzzles up to my neck and whispers in my ear “I’m pretty glad you’re not wearing anything.” As he says that he runs his hand over my dick pretty much the same way he did yesterday only without the thin layer of nylon in the way. I’m pretty worked up by this point and as happy as I am that we seem to be taking things slow, my body is starting to get pretty desperate. Just that simple touch has my hips bucking and I let out an embarrassingly loud gasp. I feel like I should ask him exactly what he wants, what he expects, but than his hand repeats the simple gesture and I can’t seem to find the words. I guess he likes my reaction because he is touching me continuously now. One second he is holding me still with a firm grip and the next he is feathering just his fingertips over my balls and penis and the next he is rubbing his thumb around just the tip. Basically his hand is all over the place and I can’t even keep track, but it feels great and I am very, very wet. “Gale.” My tone is a little warning and probably also a little desperate. “I just want to watch you Randy, please.” He says it so softly and kisses me, how can I say no?
His eyes are shut tight, his mouth is hanging open and he is panting and moaning. I’m pretty sure he’s the one wondering if he is back in high school at this point, getting jerked off on the couch. But I just can’t help myself, he is so beautiful and I want to see what he looks like when he comes. It’s awkward on this couch but I manage to wet my thumb on my free hand, which isn’t that free since I’m sort of laying on that arm, and bring it to his nipple. I swirl it gently around but I can tell he likes it cause the hand he has on my hip is gripping more tightly. I rub a little harder and then pinch lightly and I am rewarded with more moaning. Still pinching I pull a little all the while rubbing his dick in everyway I can think of and his whole body tenses for a second and then he comes. His moan is low and deep and his whole body shakes and convulses. His chest is heaving but he looks incredibly relaxed. His come is on my stomach and hand and I realize I don’t really know what to do now. I know I want more but I’m not sure what happens next. I’m silently willing Randy to take control here.
I feel like there is still the potential for Gale to freak out any minute. I’m not doubting that he wants this anymore, because he clearly does, but this just has to be weird for him. I know he said that it doesn’t bother him, but how can a straight guy be with another guy and not have it mess with his mind, at least a little. So I feel like I have to pull myself together and take control here, but I just had a fucking amazing orgasm and focusing is a little difficult right now. But then I finally open my eyes and see him, a little short of breath, dripping with my come and dick hard and throbbing, and my focus returns. He seems lost in thought, which is not what I want. He needs to be here concentrating on what we are doing. “Gale.” He looks at me, and I’m not sure why, but he looks relieved. I kiss him and say “sit up.” I get him situated on the couch leaning back and I kneel between his legs. “Just relax.” He smiles at me and I smile back. I reach up and run my hand down his chest to his belly where my come is still smeared. I scope some up with my fingers and then run them along his dick, covering it with my come. I watch Gale as I lick the remaining come off of my fingers. He’s breathing heavier and I feel like I can almost see his anticipation growing. “I’m going to suck you now Gale, OK?”
I want to say ‘thank God’, but I guess I still have a little control because I just nod. He licks from the base of my dick right up to the tip, eating his come off me, which makes me fucking crazy. He pauses for just a second to look at me before he takes me deep in his mouth. I can’t take my eyes off him, I love his mouth. The man has perfect lips, I think they are what first attracted me to him, you can tell just from looking at Randy’s mouth that he can give a good blow job. And holy fuck is it good. I’m looking right at him and I couldn’t even tell you what he is doing its just really fucking good. But then far too soon he pulls off and crawls up my body until he is straddling my lap. His lips are swollen and red and I have to kiss him. I love the feel of our cocks rubbing together as we kiss. I know I am rutting against him at this point but I’m not quite embarrassed enough to stop. He whispers in my ear, “Gale, do you want to fuck me?” I try to stay calm. “Yeah.” The word comes out as a gasp. “Just wait here.”
I come back with a condom and lube and crawl back onto Gale’s lap. I wasn’t gone long but I’m happy to see he is still with me. He moans and lets his head fall back on the couch as I rock against him. I open the lube and wet a couple of fingers. “Gale, watch me.” I rise up a little on my knees and use my fingers to prepare myself. Gale’s eyes are riveted on me. I take his hand and suck his finger, wetting them well. Then I bring his hand around to my ass. “Fuck me with your fingers.” He’s gentle at first but as I thrust against him, he pushes harder and then adds a second finger. I rip open the condom and roll it on him. I put more lube on him and he just keeps staring at me, I suppose I did tell him to watch me, but it is like he is in a trance. I move his hand away and then position his dick at my hole and press down so just the head slips in. His eyes shut and his head falls back again. I push down slowly until I’m sitting flush on his lap. “Fuck.” For a second I think I’ve hurt him before I see his face and realize he is clearly enjoying himself. I bounce lightly in his lap and I can’t even describe the sound that comes from his mouth. His dick is huge and almost overwhelming inside me but not in a bad way, in that way that makes me lose all control. I raise up very slowly and then when his dick is just barely inside I slam back down. This is going to be over very soon and I am going to make the most of it.
I grab onto his body pulling him close to me. His dick is trapped between our bodies and I wonder briefly if I should be touching him, but I just can’t do anything but hold on tight. He’s fucking himself on me; I mean really fucking himself on me, hard. I seriously can’t do one fucking thing but just hold on. “Oh God Randy.” He slows his pace but then leans in and kisses me hard and fast, the way we were just fucking. I slide my hands down his back to his ass. I love the feel of his hole all stretched out around my cock. Its wet and slippery and I need him to start moving again cause one way or another I am gonna come very soon. I use his hips to lift him up again. He smiles at me and starts up his pace again. Between pants and grunts he says “You feel so fucking good.”
His stomach is hard and muscular against my dick and I’m hardly hanging on, trying to make this last. I can feel his grip tighten on my body, pushing my dick even harder into his stomach. I know he is going to come soon, so I stop trying to hold back. I want him to feel my ass getting impossibly tighter around him. I always think my second orgasm is stronger than the first and this is no exception. I should point out that the first one was pretty damn good. Unfortunately I’m too caught up in my own climax to pay much attention to Gale’s. I’ll have to remedy that very soon. Even after it’s over I can’t stop kissing and licking him. And then something occurs to me. “Did you even bring anything for lunch?” “Nope.”